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Divorced parents making you choose? How to deal

My parents have been fighting a lot and my dad left. He moved to a different state and wants either me or my sis to move in with him. The thing is, we're both happy here and if we go anywhere, it's together. My parents don't understand this and they said we have until next month to decide. 


I want my little sister to feel comfortable, so I'm letting her choose where she goes but I really need help. I don't want to leave my friends and school. And, I don't want to leave my sister! I haven’t told anyone because it's embarrassing. They aren't even divorced yet! Please help me!


Hey chica,


I'm really sorry to hear that you¹re stuck in the middle of this pickle. Let¹s take it step by step and I promise you that you will feel more secure about this whole sitch.


Discuss it with mom and dad

First talk it out with the 'rents. Neither your mom nor pops should ever expect you and your sister to simply make a choice and be fine with it when it can change your entire lives. There is no question that you should have a say in solving this mess, or at least a way to let out your feelings. Don't feel comfy confronting mom and pops? Give them a letter where you respectfully and maturely tell them your thoughts on the situation.


Lean on your BFFs!

Secondly, don't be embarrassed. Sure, it's not something to tell the whole world, but you shouldn't feel like you can't tell anyone. Whether or not you tell the details about this problem is your choice. However, it never hurts to vent it out to the girlies you trust the most. After all, you and your sister's decision could affect your friends.


Stay strong

Lastly, whatever the outcome is, stay strong. This doesn't mean that you should totally ignore your true feelings and simply move on. Instead, find a stress-free zone by surrounding yourself by the people you love. Listen to encouraging music (how 'bout "Keep Holding On" by Avril Lavigne), and remind yourself that everything will work out in the end. If you can keep yourself together, that will help your little sister and the 'rents get through this rough time just a li'l bit better. Support each other and find a way to compromise.


Making a decision within the next month will be something tough to do. But the care you show for your sister and your sincere concern will definitely work for you and your sister's advantage in the end.




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BY JEANNIE L. ON 2/8/2014 12:13:00 AM


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