GL's Top Ten Most Unwanted Guys

As a public service to girls everywhere, GL presents the easy-to-use guide of the Top 10 Most Unwanted Guys. We zero in on the zeroes, so you can decide if it’s time to say “Bye-bye, guy!”

We know it’s easy to be swept away by a guy. Oh, boy, do we know. In the midst of full-blown crush crazies, even the sanest chica can get lured in by sparkling baby blues, a cute smile or flawless free throw. Thing is, most guys are decent. Yes, he can be slow to pick up on a crush cue, forgetful when it comes to your 42-day anniversary, fickle as far as professing undying affection. That’s normal guy stuff.
We’re talking about the not-to-be-tolerated, creepy guy stuff. Like the guy who can’t remember anything—like your name, especially when he’s hanging with his buds. Or the dude who fell for your happy-go-lucky ways but now wants you to spend 24/7 by his side playing Robotech: BattleCry. Is he crushed on you or his Xbox? And let’s get this straight—you should never waste time on a dude who makes you feel confused, sad, nervous, insecure, jealous or anything other than fabulous, even if he is cuter than a litter of kittens!
What makes it hard to sort out the good apples from the rotten ones is that whole cutie-pie, butterflies-in-the-tummy thing. You have to separate those fuzzy feelings from the cold, hard facts. Think about it: It’s usually not too tough to figure out when a best bud is treating you badly. Would you put up with a pal who doesn’t call when she says she will or constantly blows you off? Of course not! So forget those dreamy looks you get from your guy and figure out if he’s coming up short in the making-you-happy department.
Of course, there is a difference between a guy having a less-than-stellar moment and one who is just an all-out rat. The tricky thing is differentiating a guy who’s made a slip up or two from a no-good guy you need to heave-ho. GL to the rescue with our exhaustively researched rundown of chumps you’d be wise to avoid. We suffered so you don’t have to!
Master the art of identifying guys who should be kicked to the curb, and you’ll be gloriously free to concentrate on the well-balanced, considerate sweethearts who populate the world of Wanted Guys. Use this handy list as your guide.…

24/7 BOY
Who he is 24/7
Boy invites himself to do everything with you. He monopolizes your time and needs to be the center of your universe. Basically, he’s a bigger version of a bratty, tag-along 5-year-old. And you know how annoying that can get—even if it is cute and sweet at first.
What he does
24/7 Boy has a freaky way of trying to make you feel guilty when you’re not with him. Or, worse, he makes you feel claustrophobic even if he isn’t around.  When you are with him? He’s a total cling-on. You should be with a dude who likes to hang with you…but all the time? That’s just weird. If you’re his first GF, you might have to tell him you don’t need to be stuck together like glue. Otherwise…
Good reasons to let him go
Your guy oughta have some plans and pals of his own. It’s not your job to be his ’round-the-clock social director. You deserve to have a life outside of this relationship. If he makes that difficult, let him go.
Your Wanted Guy
Bill Balanced. This guy loves hanging with you—after school, at parties or in study hall. But Bill Balanced has his own life and knows you do, too! He totally gets it when you have girls’ night plans because he’s cool hanging with the guys. He understands when your schedule is super-hectic, and he gives you the time and space you need. He won’t cop an attitude if you have plans with the fam or make ridiculous demands of your time.

USER LOSER BOY

Who he is
Hello, Convenience Guy! This guy can be charming and downright sweet as powdered sugar—when he’s getting something out of the deal.
What he does
This one turns the charm way up…strategically on the day before a big test. You’ve always been an A+ student—hmm...maybe he wants a study buddy. Does he save you a seat at lunch when pro football season kicks off? Possibly, he’s itching for an invite since he’s fully aware your dad has 50-yard line Giants’ tickets. Or, maybe he shows zero interest in you at school but, once you two are alone, he gets all kissy-face.
Good reasons to let him go
This guy looks out for one person and one person only—himself! Since he’s so busy making sure it’s all good for No. 1, you’ll be lucky if he even considers you No. 2—especially if your dad gets rid of those Giants’ tickets!
Your Wanted Guy
Drew I Like You For You. This guy likes you if you get straight A’s or not. He knows your dad has Giants’ seats, but he’s perfectly content sharing a bag of Doritos and catching the game on TV with you. He’s proud of you when you’re elected class prez. He’s psyched for you when you win the $100 school raffle. He doesn’t see what you have or what you do as his good fortune. He’s a winner—football season or not!
UNCOMMON DENOMINATOR BOY
Who he is
You noticed his bright-whites the minute he walked into U.S. history. You chatted after class and swapped e-mail addresses. He’s a funny e-mailer. But on the phone or in person, you have zip to talk about.
What he does
Hmm...he’s not into sports—or even board games. He doesn’t like to rent vids or order Chinese take-out. He’s a vegan, and you’re a meat-and-potatoes girl. He’s the nature-loving type, while your idea of camping is when you and your folks say at the top of the Hyatt Regency.
Good reasons to let him go
What’s wrong with this guy? Honestly? Probably nothing. But, he’s wrong for you! A great smile and witty e-mails do not a relationship make. You can only spend so much time with a guy whose idea of fun is watching The Complete Angler and thinks your idol J.Lo is some low-calorie dessert. Face it—you have nothing in common. But, no harm in introducing him to that cute, granola girl from gym!
Your Wanted Guy
Simon Similarities. Don’t bother searching high and low for a guy who loves and hates exactly the same things you do. He doesn’t exist. Besides, how boring. But Simon Similarities is more your speed. You grind the cope on your skateboards together and can chat for hours over shrimp lo mein. He’s hardly a J.Lo fan, but he knows you are. He might even agree to go to a J.Lo show if you’ll sit through Jackass: The Movie on vid with him.

MAKEOVER BOY
Who he is
Maybe you would look better if your chestnut locks were blond. Maybe you should lose your cat-eye glasses and go for color contacts. Your guy’s convinced. Oh, and he thinks you should trade in drums for flute.   

What he does
He has something to say about just everything you say, wear or do. He might make subtle suggestions or boldly announce that your Lucky’s would look way better if you dropped a couple pounds. 
Good reasons to let him go
One word—self-esteem. His “constructive criticism” can be a self-confidence killer. Any guy who rags on the color of your shoelaces is scary. Sooner or later, you might think you need his OK on everything. He doesn’t know it, but this guy’s need to control is all about his insecurity. By tricking people into thinking they need his guidance, he feels important. Meanwhile, he’s turning you into someone you’re not.
Your Wanted Guy
Don’t Go Changing Chad. A righteous dude encourages you to be yourself and make your own choices. Don’t Go Changing Chad likes you as is and isn’t at all interested in giving you an overhaul. If he likes your new sweater, he’ll tell you because he’s good at doling out compliments. A worthy dude likes the true you—frizzy hair, baggy jeans, occasional zit and all.
ARM CANDY BOY
Who he is
It’s great when a guy flips for you. But his attention is over the top and heavily focused on your looks. Ya gotta wonder if he’s only after a pretty face. If your guy goes deaf when you try talking to him about serious stuff, like a brawl with your BFF, beware that he’s more concerned with your good looks than the inner you.
  
What he does
He only calls to make sure you’re free Friday night. He’s not big on hanging one-on-one, but he’s quick to introduce you to his buddies. When you’re out, he’s into public displays of affection. He’s clearly more concerned with how other people react to him than whether you’re having a good time. This guy is all show, and you’re his pony.
Good reasons to let him go
You deserve way more than to be treated like a new toy! This guy digs you because he thinks you make him look good—and you probably do. But, you’re more of an accessory than a GF. Anyone who places so much emphasis on your good looks isn’t concerned with what’s inside. So, he’ll have no problem trading you in for a newer, shinier toy should one come along. Trade him in first!
Your Wanted Guy
Not Shallow Sam. He knows and appreciates you’re totally adorable, and he tells you so. But he’s also amused by your witty sarcasm and is blown away by your poetic genius. Sure, he totally digs your looks, but he’s not into parading you around.

MOOD MANIPULATOR BOY

Who he is
Can you say “emotional roller coaster”? Your emotions are hinged upon how this guy treats you. Mr. Mood Manipulator loves controlling your highs and lows—especially if he senses you’re vulnerable to manipulating ways.
What he does
By controlling your moods, he makes you dependent on him to feel good about yourself. He figures as long as he can jerk your emotional chain, he’s in command. Example? One night he calls twice, and you go to sleep feeling like a princess. The next morning, he barely eeks out, “Hey,” and you feel like mud. But later that afternoon, he reels you back in with an offer to hit the coffee shop for extra-large hot chocolates, his treat. Confused?
Good reasons to let him go
This guy keeps you in a constant state of confusion. No matter how securely you think your seatbelt is fastened, this ride is way dangerous, and the cycle will get worse over time. If you hand over the reins of your emotions to someone else, you surrender the power to make yourself happy. You need to be the master of your happiness.
Your Wanted Guy
Even-Keeled Kevin. A good guy never makes you dependent on him for your happiness. Sure, Even-Keeled Kevin has ups and downs, like everyone, but he’s fairly predictable. He’s in control of his own moods, not yours. He hates to see you blue, and he’d hate it even more if he thought it was his doing. This guy’s a source of support, not stress.
HOUDINI BOY
Who he is
Now you see him, now you don’t. One day you have a blast together, the next he’s MIA. How does he do that? What he does He’s supposed to walk you home from school, but he never shows. Turns out, he made other plans (and forgot to tell you!). He says he’ll call, but the phone rarely rings—oops, he lost track of time, again. This guy will never remember your middle name or birthday, even if you give him multiple choices.
Good reasons to let him go
Don’t let his here-today/gone-tomorrow shenanigans sneak up on you. No, he doesn’t have to be at your beck and call, but he needs to clue in. If he’s spreading himself too thin between school, hobbies, family life, chores, etc, cut him some slack. But, if he doesn’t give you the courtesy of a phone call when he can’t post, then, dear, you’ve been stood up—and that stinks! If his now-he’s-here/now-he’s-not stunts are becoming a predictable pattern, sorry, but it’s time to make Mr. Inconsiderate disappear for good!
Your Wanted Guy
Darn Dependable Dan No matter how busy he is or how spacey he can be, a good guy—especially one who digs you—isn’t so forgetful. Dependable Dan actually wants to hang out with you. Even if he spaces on plans, he doesn’t come up with some lame excuse and understands you felt let down. He’ll give you a sincere apology…and might even offer to make it up to you!

SHORT FUSE BOY

Who he is
He might be super-cute. He might have really cool friends. And, he might be tons of fun—until something just doesn’t quite go his way. From out of nowhere, your boy can snap from cool and calm to angry and testy! This guy needs a chill pill and then some!

What he does
SFB doesn’t like surprises. And he’s not a big fan of compromise. Even the littlest thing can set him off. Like, when you two stood in line to see Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers and the tickets sold out, he had a major meltdown. You suggested grabbing some pizza in the mall and waiting until a later showing. He had zero interest in making the best of it. In his mind, the night was ruined—and he ruined your good time with his childish hissy fit.

Good reasons to let him go
This guy’s nasty, explosive temper way outweighs his good points! You will shortly tire of tip-toeing around his temper. What if you say the wrong thing? Ah! He’ll freak on you. His uncontrolled mood swings and fits of rage are so not cool.
Your Wanted Guy
Go With The Flow Freddie. Freddie’s emotions are in check. He’s flexible, and he can handle life’s curve balls without throwing a fit. He is capable of bouncing back, compromising and moving on if there’s a wrench in his plans. You guys can see Two Towers next week, no biggie. He never takes his disappointments out on you.
DOUBLE TROUBLE BOY
Who he is
This is bad news with a bad attitude. Stop trying to convince yourself otherwise. Your friends know this guy is no good. Your parents are hardly fans, and the principal is definitely on to him. Despite his deep, mysterious eyes and love for the fast lane, don’t hang too close to Trouble.
What he does
He’s got a foul mouth, takes stupid risks, hangs with the wrong crowd and thinks detention is a required class. He might push your limits, like trying to get  too close for comfort. He might ask you to share a smoke even though he knows you’re totally against it.
Good reasons to let him go
You are not a loser. But cutting school, getting F’s, smoking, drinking, and insisting that none of it’s a big deal means you choose to lose. Even if your slate’s totally clean, people are apt to lose trust in you because you’re dating such a derelict. Stay true to you and drop DTB like a bad habit.
Your Wanted Guy
Positively Adventurous Peter. Make sure your rebel has a cause. It’s great to meet a guy with a cool vibe who does out-of-the-ordinary things that aren’t harmful or stupid. Like someone with blue hair who organizes poetry slams. As long as he can make a statement without breaking the law, he’s OK in our book. Also, you want a guy who cares about how people perceive you and would never pressure you to do stuff that makes you uncomfortable.

ME-ME-ME BOY

Who he is
It’s hard to miss this guy. His ego’s so big that his head’s about to explode. Everything is all about him, always.
What he does
Me-Me-Me Boy has no clue what you want to do Saturday or how your chem test went, nor does he care. You go to movies he wants to see, listen to bands he wants to hear and see each other when he feels like it. Conversations consist of a 20-minute tribute to his stellar basketball skills. He might as well take out a billboard to advertise his superiority, killer good looks and sweet successes. Oh, puh-lease!
Good reasons to let him go
No matter what’s going on in your world, he’s always on Planet Super Ego. The only way to interact with him is by becoming his personal cheerleader. Sorry, no way this egomaniac will ever care about anything as much as he cares about his perfect tan.

Your Wanted Guy
Charlie Confident. This guy is psyched about his life, but he’s fully clued in to the reality that Earth does not revolve around him. Charlie Confident accepts compliments graciously but has no problem giving anyone else props. He doesn’t parade his accomplishments around. That’s because his self-esteem is firmly intact, and he doesn’t need the affirmation of others to feel good about himself. Besides, he’d rather brag about more important things—like you!

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by Raquel Singer-Klein | 2/1/2016
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