TYPES OF KISSES
YUMMY KISSES!Want to know what kinds of kisses rule? Kissing class is now in session….
The Big Little. The value of a quick peck should never be underestimated. Whether on his lips or his cheek, a Big Little is a great way to show affection and tell a guy you’re interested!
The Butterfly Kiss. Want to send the ultimate “kiss me!” signal? Lean in and ever-so-slightly touch his cheek with your cheek. Then see if you can graze his cheek with your eyelashes. Don’t be too obvious—it’s just like you’re brushing up against him. Nice to do on the dance floor.
The Soft Serve. A soft, slo-mo peck is about as delicious as kisses come. A kiss doesn’t need to be two people playing tongue hockey for it to be wonderful.
The Triple Crown. This is a succession of Soft Serves. Instead of planting just one slo-mo peck on him, hit him with three in a row. What you’re doing is building steam…until you get to the Full Symphony (see below).
The Full Symphony. French kissing, when done right, is like an epic dance move. This is, as you’ve surely already gathered, where your tongues get involved. But only if you’re ready!
YUCKY KISSES!Here are the worst of the worst—and what to do if you get a kisser who falls into one of these categories.
The Dental Exam (a.k.a. The Oral-All-Over).
The Kiss: He’s exploring your gums, teeth and entire mouth like his tongue has a dental camera on the tip of it. Yuck!
The Diss: Slow Captain Periodontics down by kissing his upper lip, then moving to his lower. You want to show your hottie that kissing you is about tenderness, not toothiness.
The Grand Canyon (a.k.a. The DNA Sampler)
The Kiss: His mouth is so open it’s like a huge spit hole on his face. This kisser also likes to stick his tongue as deep into your mouth as possible, as if he wants you to say, “Aaahhh…”
The Diss: Simply pull back a little so his tongue can’t reach past, say, your second molar. You want him to kiss you, not check your tonsils.
The Flopping Fish (a.k.a. The Wrestler)
The Kiss: He’s got two moves with his tongue: 1) vigorously up, and 2) vigorously down. When he’s really warmed up, he might go side to side. This guy isn’t into kissing in a sweet, gentle way. He’s into kissing like he’s on the mat.
The Diss: Before you toss this one out of the ring or back to sea, see if you can reel him in. Your tongue is actually a muscle, so tongue-wrestle his into submission by pushing it up and, well, sorta “pinning” it. Then you can expertly take over the kiss.
The Hot Tamale (a.k.a. The Gas Mask)
The Kiss: This one isn’t so much about the kiss as what’s behind it. The kiss might be a winner if your dude didn’t taste like fermented burger burps.
The Diss: If you’re bold enough to offer him a mint, do it and carry on with the kissin’. If not, breathe solely out of your mouth. It’s not much help, but it’s better than his nasty exhale burning your nostrils. And next time, take a bite of his chili burger—it’ll soften the blow.
The Slime Puppy (a.k.a. The Lollipop)
The Kiss: This guy’s a licker. Too much spit. He’s treating your face like it’s a double scoop of Cherry Garcia.
The Diss: Maneuver so that when he goes in for a lick, the tip of his tongue meets the tip of yours. Keep at it until you find a rhythm, a style. Two tongues doing the tango can be tasty. One tongue lapping up your cheekbone is just plain icky.