Now, my mom has a boyfriend that has an autistic daughter who drives me nuts! She breaks my stuff, takes my things and takes all the attention away from me. It's been hard on my brother who now is a control freak. He's also very violent. My mom's too busy at work and when I try to talk to her all she tells me to do is ignore him or grow up. How can I save my family from falling apart?

It must be very frustrating to not be able to talk to your mom about your dad sitches. You must also feel frustrated that you can’t even earn any respect from your step mom either. But I know you can get through this, girlie.

First, write everything out. When you can organize your thoughts, you will be able to say exactly what you want.Plan a day where you can talk to your dad and your step mom. This sounds scary but you can do it. Use “I feel” statements to tell your dad how you wish he would listens to you because you want to have your feelings heard. Also tell your dad without putting too much blame on him, that everything that is frustrating you as well. Tell your step mom that your feelings get hurt whenever she called you names and that you hope to earn her respect one day.

Listen to your dad and step mom’s side as well. By letting both sides talk and say what they need to say, everyone will get their words across and be able to solve this sitch. Try to spend some time with her, and maybe you can form a bond with her and your step mom as well.

Take the same steps in dealing with your mom's sitch. Write it out, talk it out and just let her know how you feel. Dealing with an autistic child can be very stressful, so try to be understanding of that. Tell your mom that you're concerned about your brother and you just want the best for him and for all of you.

If you follow these steps, you will be able to get your feelings out and find some inner peace. And remember, if you need someone to listen to you, call up your BFF or hop on the GL blog to chat it out with any of the girlies here. Good luck, babe!

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4/25/2009 7:00:00 AM