My chica might date a cheater

My friend has a boyfriend and he's a cheater! Before they were dating he dated another girl and cheated on her. He was even going to cheat on her again with my friend!


I'm afraid that he will eventually cheat because of his slimy past but how do I make my friend realize this? Help!


Hey babe, this is a really tough position for you to be in! On the one hand, you want to be supportive of your friend and her relationship, but on the other hand, you don't want her to get hurt. Hmm…how do you keep your girl from getting hurt…without getting TOO involved in her relationship?


Talk to you friend first. When you sit down with her, open with something like, "Because I really care about you and support you no matter what, I wanted to talk about this new guy." The main thing to remember is to not criticize him or their relationship because that automatically gives her all the reason to say, "That's none of your business so butt out." Keep it very focused on her—not him.


Tell her that you're open to welcoming her BF into your circle and hope his rumored cheating is a thing of the past, but you’re really worried that she might get hurt. Opening up to her like this in the beginning will let her know that she has a good friend in you that she can trust in case he does end up cheating.


Maybe this guy was just in an immature relationship when he cheated on his girlfriend and has learned his lesson and won't do it again. Everyone makes mistakes and should be given a second chance. Or maybe there is truth to the saying, "Once a cheater, always a cheater." Either way, if your friend wants to give it a shot with him, she has the right to do so.


You never want a guy to get in the middle of a friendship so until you notice anything sketchy about him, try to give him a chance and stay out of it as much as possible. If you do hear rumors about him or notice him treating your friend badly, follow up and talk to her again about it.


-Katie S.

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8/7/2009 7:00:00 AM
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