Newcomer in our clique

My two best friends have been hanging out with a girl who I don’t really want to be around. She talks about people (sometimes our other friends) behind their backs.


Plus, whenever we hang out, all four of us, they go off on their own without me. It's like she hogs them. Should I confront her? Stay away from her? I’ve tried ignoring her, and I’m afraid that if I get close to her and we get in a fight that she’ll end up talking about me. What should I do?


Hey babe, adding a new girl to a close group of friends can be really frustrating and stressful but trust me, it happens to all of us at some point and it usually isn't as big a deal as we make it seem.


The important thing to remember is that these other girls are your BFFs. They obviously like you for a reason and they're not going to ditch you the second a new chica comes along. Don't worry about what COULD happen. Just figure out how to handle what's going on right now.


Give the girl a shot...

What to do about the newbie? Figure out if she's truly an evil friend-stealer who you should stay away from, or someone who mighta gave you the wrong first impression. Were you being too judgmental because you were intimidated by her and the new relationships she made with your pals? It's normal to feel this way, and we all do it without even realizing it. Try to start over with her and take a fresh approach. Does she have any redeeming qualities? Just think, this could be the start of a great friendship.


Speak up!

Gave the new girl a shot and she still seems sketchy? Talk to your friends about what she's saying and doing. News flash: talking about people and leaving others out is so not cool. So, it's better to get these things off your chest before you ruin friendships with your besties, too.


I'm sure you can work it out, girl. Just give her another chance. If that doesn't work I'm sure you can find a compromise between you and your best chicas.


-Katie S.

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10/14/2009 7:00:00 AM
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