My best friend is great, but she has one little flaw. She doesn't share. She has admitted to me that she doesn't really like to, and I get it. But sometimes it really bugs me.

I try to openly share food at lunch, pencils, or other things with her so that maybe if she won't give me anything I can say, "Well I gave you this...." But she still doesn't share. I don't know what to do!

That’s a total bummer about your friend, but awesome that you want to help her change her ways for the better. Hopefully with a little encouragement she’ll do a total 180 and you’ll be sharing clothes, pencils and food with her in no time.

It sounds like she needs a little lesson in kindness and generosity. Be empathetic and allow her to borrow things that are important and meaningful to you. Emphasize just how much you value these belongings, but how you trust her enough to enjoy and return them in the same condition that you gave them to her.

People have a tendency to be selfish unless there is something in it for them. You could also try to show her some tough love. Your friend might not like to share, but she might ask to borrow things from you. If she keeps up her unsharing ways, don't let her take your stuff. Tell her that you trust her with your belongings, but sharing is a mutual thing and if she wants to borrow from you then she should be willing to share, too.

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10/21/2009 7:00:00 AM