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Ask Bill & Dave

Is He My BFF or BF!?

 

I’ve had a crush on this guy for months. We see each other almost every day and hold hands often. We have lunch, see movies and do practically everything together! I call him, and he’s at my house in like a minute.


So, the other day I asked him who his best friend is and he said I am. I was extremely flattered…but also confused.


I thought he liked me as a GF. What’s up?


BILL: Isn’t man’s best friend supposed to be a dog? But you don’t hold hands with your pet so, obviously, this guy is serious about you. Maybe he’s moved past the stage of shyly professing attraction to the much higher stage of professing affection. Consider it a compliment. Pat him on the head and say, “Good boy!”


DAVE: It sounds as though you get to do all the cool BF/GF stuff, and your guy is there for you in a shake. So big deal if he’s having a little difficulty defining things. Small price to pay for bliss. Besides, lots of guys consider their GFs to also be their BFFs. So there.


TELL US NOW! Boys got ya baffled? Ask Bill and Dave what's up. Just click the purple SEND A QUESTION button.

BY CAITLIN R. ON 6/20/2009 7:00:00 AM 316 COMMENTS

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316 READER COMMENTS

one of my ex boyfriends of two years ago, wants to date me again. we finally became friends and now he is like my best friend. he moved to georgia this year for a few monthes to live with his dad. one day we were talking on facebook, and he told me he hasnt dated anyone in georgia because hes waiting for me, and that hes changed and wants to fix his mistakes. we arent even going out yet, because he hasnt fully moved back here. but he doesnt text me anymore, and he ignores me, and he acts like im no big deal anymore. i thought when he told me he only told me about him moving back that i was special or something but now i feel, like he just said it as a joke or something... what should i think about this? please help me im confused

futurewriter101 on 3/21/2010 3:34:56 PM

okay,my ex-bf told me he loved me last year. i'm only 12 and i dont want "LOVE". i broke up with him and this year we got back together and the same thing happened and i broke up with him. i dont love him, but idk if i even like him anymore. i wanna be his friend but idk..HELP ME!

peterpanwearsgreen on 3/18/2010 11:56:34 PM

Hey guys. I have a huge crush on this guy, but we don't have any classes together. I was about to start a convo with him when someone told him I liked him and thought it was hot when he sweats. Which it is, but...now I don't know how to talk to him without making things totally awkward!

Horseluva123 on 3/18/2010 8:02:19 PM

Hi, I am a girl who just turned into a teenager. I was watching a show called Millionaire Match Maker the other day which is a show about people who get set up through another person. The lady that sets people up does anything... such as she sets us straight people, lesbians, gay people, bisexuals, and also people who do not know if they are straight or not. I happened to be watching an episode where there was one lady who did not no if she was straight or not so she tried going lesbian, and another lady who was bisexual. At the end of the show both people at the end of their dates ended up kissing. I got a feeling in my body that i really liked when they kissed. I also realized i like watching lesbians kiss, i am really confused and dont know if this is weird. in the end i am really trying to say am i a lesbian for liking these things?




Hey girl, not necessarily. Unfortunately the answer is different for different people. Which way you go, however, is something you'll explore through adulthood. Know it's a journey and that you're fine either way you find you are.

xoxo
Alyssa B.

legitGL on 3/17/2010 10:07:56 PM

MODS MODS MODS MODS ok so yesterday, my friend asked if she could talk to my crush for me bcuz she knew that i thought he was being a jerk. so turns out, my friend, (jessica) talked to him ,and @ the end of the day I asked wat he said. this is what happened jess- so wats up with u and (me)? crush- oh god jess-wat? crush-she has been obsessed with me since 1st grade. jessica didn't really say anything next but i am not obsessed and i started liking him in 4th grade and im in 7th. im really upset. how do i deal? plz answer fast!!!!!!!! xoxoxox

 

Hey girlie,
I'm sorry for the misunderstanding.  Your friend prob was just trying to help, and didn't get the details straight.  You can tell her about how you're feeling, then just move forward from there.  It might feel overwhelming now, but I promise the drama will fade soon.  Good luck!


Marie H.

fashionista37 on 3/17/2010 5:25:26 PM

hey guys um my guy freind used to like me and i liked him and then one night on fb(facebook) he had to do something and he wouldnt tell me what so the next day he tells me he doesnt like me any more. he doesnt like me because a girl called him and said she liked him then the girl cheated on him and now he still doesnt like me at least i dont think he does im confused!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

taytay23 on 3/16/2010 10:10:36 PM

My boyfriend says he loves me sooo much but sometimes he doesn't act it and ignores me. Sometimes he flirts with other girls even my bestie! Then when we hang out he acts like nothing is wrong and is totally into me. I have bawled my eyes out wondering what I did wrong. I'm so confused! HELP! D:

PJforever on 3/16/2010 3:02:05 PM

Me and this guy (that i really like) Used to hang out alot. We would go to the movies and the mall together! Then I kindly and expresed my feelings for him on a letter i wrote. He acted all cool for a while so didnt think he got my letter and i didnt care. So i called him up one saterday morning and asked him if he wanted to go to a carnival with me my freind and her BF. He was really quet and i hadto say something but when i said his name he just went UM and then he hung up the phone now we hang at school and dont eamil or call or hang out out of school! Ia he being pg headed?

markocrazy1 on 3/16/2010 11:35:54 AM

My BF always wants to hang out and always texted me now that i told him being to clingiy isnt good he hardly textez me and never wants to hang out. Hes also being pushed to hug me and its not right cuz he thinks hes going to get beat up by his friend if he doesnt. IDK what to do about this and joks are made but im happy with him. Please help me!!! IDK about what to do?????

smeaker 9 on 3/15/2010 8:38:32 PM

MOD MOD MOD MOD MOD I need your advice. I like two guys. One is not that cute, really smart, on and off sweet, and I really like him. The other one is a very cute, very smart, very sweet guy.. and he likes me too. I know the other guy is a better choice, but I really like the first one. What should I do?

 

Hey girlfriend, if you really like the first guy, go with him. He sounds really cool and you want to be with someone you can have fun with so pick him. Smile

Lynae P.

Icegalgirl1017 on 3/14/2010 3:04:41 PM

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME WELL THIS IS THE STORY I WAS IN 5TH GRADE I HAD TO CHOSE SCHOOL FOR MIDDLE SCHOOL AND THEY DIDNT ACEPT ME ON ANY SCHOOL SO THEN SINCE THAT HAPPPEND I COULD CHOSE ANY SCHOOL FROM THE WHOLE BRONX SO I WANTED TO GO TO ANOTHER SCHOOL BUT I WENT WITH MY SO CALL BFF BUT I WAS NOT IN THE SAME CLASS AS HER ON 6TH GRADE I MET THIS REALLY CUTE/NICE GUY HE Was in my class so then few months later he was going out wif some gurl then my new friend like the same boy and was jelous no one knew but i was 2 then in the middle of the year my friend went out wif him they really never seem like a couple but then all the the time i was his friend we were cool and all that to my friend and him broke up then at the end of the year my crush best friend told me if i like the boy i like i said idk he said yes u do because i know and then he told me my crush really like i didnt know wat to do so i told him it was a lie the next day my crush didnt come 2 school because he went to P.R the whole summer vacation i thought and thought that i really really like my crush so now that im in 7th grade i was still cool wif my crush so then some 2 months past this girl was going to was going out wif my crush this was a new girl so then i they broke up and i told my crush i really like him since then we stop talking its been 5 months i havent talk to him but now i just want to be friends....but around 2 months ago my crush told me he didnt like me so loud my friends try to convince him but nothing but so alot of things had happend between these months but like 1 weeks ago my crush was going to say sorry etc but i was scared so i didnt go but just before that he got hit in the face with the football so we didnt have time to talk but the day before my friend herd that he said he hates when i hide and i do but yesterday we had to finish some class work we came up from lunch and i saw him and we stare at eachother for like for 1 mn and he was like watz up with his head HELP ME IDK WAT TO DO!!

crazy4lyfe on 3/13/2010 1:37:54 PM

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME WELL THIS IS THE STORY I WAS IN 5TH GRADE I HAD TO CHOSE SCHOOL FOR MIDDLE SCHOOL AND THEY DIDNT ACEPT ME ON ANY SCHOOL SO THEN SINCE THAT HAPPPEND I COULD CHOSE ANY SCHOOL FROM THE WHOLE BRONX SO I WANTED TO GO TO ANOTHER SCHOOL BUT I WENT WITH MY SO CALL BFF BUT I WAS NOT IN THE SAME CLASS AS HER ON 6TH GRADE I MET THIS REALLY CUTE/NICE GUY HE Was in my class so then few months later he was going out wif some gurl then my new friend like the same boy and was jelous no one knew but i was 2 then in the middle of the year my friend went out wif him they really never seem like a couple but then all the the time i was his friend we were cool and all that to my friend and him broke up then at the end of the year my crush best friend told me if i like the boy i like i said idk he said yes u do because i know and then he told me my crush really like i didnt know wat to do so i told him it was a lie the next day my crush didnt come 2 school because he went to P.R the whole summer vacation i thought and thought that i really really like my crush so now that im in 7th grade i was still cool wif my crush so then some 2 months past this girl was going to was going out wif my crush this was a new girl so then i they broke up and i told my crush i really like him since then we stop talking its been 5 months i havent talk to him but now i just want to be friends....but around 2 months ago my crush told me he didnt like me so loud my friends try to convince him but nothing but so alot of things had happend between these months but like 1 weeks ago my crush was going to say sorry etc but i was scared so i didnt go but just before that he got hit in the face with the football so we didnt have time to talk but the day before my friend herd that he said he hates when i hide and i do but yesterday we had to finish some class work we came up from lunch and i saw him and we stare at eachother for like for 1 mn and he was like watz up with his head HELP ME IDK WAT TO DO!!

crazy4lyfe on 3/13/2010 1:37:26 PM

help my friends bf is so clingy but i like him so i have ben realy cranky and i cant get over him so what do i do help plz.

cloeberry on 3/10/2010 11:16:57 PM

i have a ? all my friends have bf's but i don't. my friend sead that a dude likes me should i beleve her?

cloeberry on 3/10/2010 10:25:18 PM

Hay guys i really need help here pleaseSmileOk so i met this guy at my school dance and as soon as he saw me he liked me a lot and i like him i lot 2 hes so hot kind and muture. Only problem is its been 4 weeks and he still hasnt asked me out yet . All his friends say hes really into me and that one day when i was talking to him he wanted to kiss me, but then my friend came up and started flirting with him they started talking in spanish wich i dont understand. When my mom came and picked me up apprently she started touching his abbs and muscles call me very taratorell but she already has 2 bf's What should i do she doesnt even no him. but she keeps saying if i dont go out with him she is going to steel him from me HELPME<3




Hey girlie! Give your guy some time; he's probably just nervous about asking you out, even if he's totally into you! As for your bff, I think you should have a heart-to-heart with her. You've known her for a longer time than this guy, and it would be sad if your friendship was broken as a result of this dude! 
Kelli S.

luvs13 on 3/6/2010 11:00:24 AM

I really like this boy. But whenever I try to flirt with him, nothing turns out the way I plan. My friend is having pool party, and he's going to be there. How can I attract his attention? please respond ASAP.

pinkponies17 on 3/5/2010 8:41:46 PM

Hi,
I love your advice columm. I was wondering,
Do guys talk about girls as much as we talk about them? And if a guys best friend says his friend likes you, is it true?

kitkatluver12 on 3/5/2010 2:19:03 PM

im confused about this guy..he's been my friend for nearly 2 years and everytime i see him i get butterflies. i have recently broken up with my boyfriend but i still keep thinking about my friend. he goes to universtiy and im still stuck in london and so whenever he texts me, he never asks about how im doing he just goes on about he feels! its annoyin ..i dont know whether he's interested or not because we kissed a few times when he came down recently and apparently he said he feels the same about me?

joti-s on 3/4/2010 1:52:55 PM

at school it seem like more and more girls are gettng pregnant. i want kids too but not now. tlkn about babies is fun to me but the more they tlk about them the more interested i become what can i do about this?




Hey babe! That's exactly it...all the talk about babies makes them seem fun, adorable, and cool...but there is a lot more to it than that! Responsibility, money, and lots of time are required in raising a baby. We are still kids and we should enjoy the childhood we have now instead of wishing it away.  It's okay to be a virgin. Try watching the Pregnancy pact on Lifetime (it's a movie), or Sixteen and Pregnant on MTV....babies aren't all the hype! Those teen-moms give up their childhoods and alot end up miserable.   
Megan R.

MzLadyBug4ever on 3/1/2010 6:30:50 PM

my bf broke up with me like two weeks ago. I never kissed him and i think thats the reason for our break up. what can i do to get him back but not give in to what he wants?




Hey babe, if he wants to kiss you and broke up with you over it, then he's not worth it. Stick to what you want and what makes you comfortable. If you're not ready to kiss him, you don't have to!  
Megan R.

MzLadyBug4ever on 3/1/2010 5:45:18 PM

Problem, I've been stuck on a bad boy since the beginning of school. He's what's keepin me from persuin this good guy who helps coach my sisters hockey team.
Smile ciarra

ciarrasweetie on 2/28/2010 7:31:17 PM

So, the most popular, hawt, boy in my grade (possibly school) is in sum of my classes. He knos i like him but one of his friends told me hes not diggin it. I think hes more into himself and breakin laws than me. But its soo hard to get ovr some1 uve like since the first day.

ciarrasweetie on 2/28/2010 7:17:00 PM

heyy everyone! so i need advice on how to get over my ex, i just cant.

xdaagbfx on 2/26/2010 4:59:03 PM

Dear bill and dave
i have this boi tht i used to go out wit we were in love and we were going out for a whole 6 months sum one came along sumone older tht liked me i wuz blinded bye the fact that sumone older like me so i dropped the other relationship for a new we broke a week l8er and i know tht i want ma ex bac we were crazy in luv i cant cuz i hurt hym so he moved and he wants to do lond distance but he lives far n tlkin to hym on the fone makes me wanna see him more wht should i doo help and he still has crazy feelings for me help mepleez

cheergyrl15 on 2/25/2010 11:03:42 AM

Hey I need some advice. I really like this guy but we have been friends for years. I have had a major crush on him for the last year or two, and yesterday I found out he just started going out with my friend, she isn`t a super close friend but I talk to her. I didn`t even know they even talked to each other! I don`t even think they`d make a good couple as far as I know they don`t have much in common. I mean I know both of them and I don`t know what they have in common, it`s not just that she`s a cheerleader and he`s way into science, but she`s really nice so I wasn`t upset with her. I guess I will wait untill they break up but after that how do I get him to like me?




Hey babe! No need to sit around waiting, go out and meet other boys! He's not worth it if he's not putting you first.  The guy you were crushing on and your friend may have had some kind of connection going on without you knowing in the past.  There are other guys out there who will give you the attention you deserve!  
Megan R.

lovely96 on 2/23/2010 5:12:40 PM

there is this boy on my b.ball team that i REALLY like. everytime i tlk to him i stutter or just go completely blank. i told my sister about it and she said i might have my first crush... he iz very shy around girls and very sweet and cute. if he is my first crush what should i do......

Sassy J on 2/20/2010 10:55:55 PM

1234....are the people I have a crush on and they do not know.Is that too much?What do I do?

EmmaM on 2/19/2010 7:25:50 PM

I used to like a guy but then he called me stupid I've been ignoring him since is that right?

EmmaM on 2/19/2010 7:19:35 PM

I have too many crushes!What do I do?

EmmaM on 2/19/2010 7:15:08 PM

Hey, my BFF cannot be single! One day this guy she didn't even know asked her out and she said yes because she hated her two weeks of being single. During V-day she hung out with her controlling ex so she wouldn't be alone.I told her that I was afraid she'd get hurt by getting back with these guys. She said I only hated him because he was racist against non christians. (I'm Jewish) How is this old flame getting between us? How do I keep my friend from getting hurt?

arg5890 on 2/18/2010 8:30:11 PM

It looks like you have a bad situation!!!!! Do alot more girlfriend stuff with him. Then he might ask you out. Or just ask him outSmile!!!!!!Smile!!!!!!Smile!!!!!SmileSmile

Lillypad9910 on 2/18/2010 5:42:58 PM

you should definetly discuss it with your friends, and tell them why you want to talk to him

GreekGirl67 on 2/16/2010 3:36:53 PM

If you feel liek this guy is good for you, go for it. But try to talk to your friends about it so they know where youre coming from too.

GreekGirl67 on 2/16/2010 3:33:07 PM

You should try to figure out which one is better for you and which one will treat you better. If one of them comes to mind right away, you have your answerSmile hope this helps!

GreekGirl67 on 2/16/2010 3:30:45 PM

Heyy girl,

GreekGirl67 on 2/16/2010 3:29:14 PM

Maya M I need idvice!

shortstuff111 on 2/15/2010 11:31:20 PM

I kinda like this boy but all my friends tell me that i dontneedhim so i dont know what i should do. If i decided to talk to him i would notknow how to tell him i like him. Please Help

mandyboo1999 on 2/12/2010 11:31:15 PM

Hey Girl,
Sounds like you have got quite the situation...Smile
But what you need to do is give it some time...Then when you think you are ready tell him how you feel about it..Because all u could no is he could be wondering the same thing about you...
"Does she like me?"I mean go for it....!!!!
I think that it sounds like hes pretty into you..Smile

Vanilla_star96 on 2/12/2010 10:05:47 AM

how much older should your bf be than you?

gossipgirlfan101 on 2/11/2010 10:37:14 PM

Dear Dave,
My ex and I broke up 4 months ago. I'm still crazy in love with him and want to go back out. We dated for 19 months! He sends me mixed signals so I'm not sure if he wants to try it again. We don't text a lot but he told me I don't talk a lot to him anymore. He likes this other girl but she lives in a different state and said she'd never date a freshman so I'm not that worried about her, even though they text all day everyday. I'm not sure if he still likes me or not. We talk a little bit at school. He still looks at me secretly at break and stuff. My friends say we'll have another chance but I'm not sure. Help?

oneduffisenough3 on 2/10/2010 5:11:03 PM

Hay i have a ? There is this boy in a town close bye and he always says hi and follows me too. he has a kinda of a girlfriend she is older than him but everybody says he really doesn't act like he likes her and he is kinda cute but he follows me and looks at me like he likes me,but is always with his boys do you think he likes me??????????????????

boy confused

DDAY on 2/7/2010 4:21:17 PM

One of my BFFs told me that one of my BGFs best friends told her that my BGF talked about me sometimes and said that he might like me. Valentine's Day is only a week away, and I like him too. What do I do?

lucy408 on 2/7/2010 2:25:24 PM

Mod -
So im in love with this down to earth "cute boy " and i really like him and i dont know if he likes me.how do i find out ?do i ask him out ?




Well i suggest you talk to him and start up a friendship with him. If you two talk, things will start happening and maybe he'll even start liking you. Good luck! xoxo kerra 
Kerra S.

emigirl97 on 2/5/2010 11:45:09 PM

HEY! I NEED MAJOR ADVICE! IM SOOOOO CONFUSED! the boy i like knows i like him and we text a lot. we would text for hours and it would be amazing. we r so similar. but in school if i look at him he gets really tense and looks like he is gonna pee his pants. he wont talk to me in person and his friends smile when they look at me. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN!? WHAT SHOULD I DO!?

 

Hey girl,

 

Guys are kinda funny sometimes - it isn't easy to tell what they mean sometimes!  But if he talks to you a lot and seems to be interested, he might be!  Try asking him to hang out sometime and see how comfortable it feels.

Lauren C.

Artsychic#70 on 2/5/2010 5:07:09 PM

hi..i am 15 and met a guy who is 19 on the internet who lives in nepal..i met him on a poetyr site..i know what u are thinking :be careful..i am careful it is not like i will be seeing him anytime soon..but he says he loves me and has even written poetry for me..i really love him and he has asked me to date him i said yes..please help..he also told me he was going to come to the us in 3-4 years..he says the first he will want to see is me...oh and we have been talking since october of 09..please help please......

 

Hey girl,

 

You know what I'm gonna say here - this is NOT a good idea.  It's totally cool to be web-friends with gals on GL.com, but as soon as you start exchanging personal info, developing feelings, and talking about meeting up, you cross into a danger zone.  Think about it.  I know you like him, but you have NO real proof that he is as old as he claims, he lives where he says he does, or he looks like he says he does.  The Internet is a scary place and, no matter what, you cannot trust that a person is being genuine.  I know it will be hard, but please please please stop talking to him!  I promise you that you can have tons of fun talking to guys right here in front of you!

Lauren C.

rosieuchiha on 2/5/2010 9:18:14 AM

I've always had a problem with liking guys and never telling them (sometimes my friends do) I can't get a boyfriend, and I kind of want one. What can I do to make myself more approachable to guys?

Marisa2015 on 2/4/2010 3:37:12 PM

wat if ur crush likes u and u now but ur crush is goin out wit someone else and u asked him if we will get together someday on and he said yea and idk wat to do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

shary28 on 2/3/2010 9:59:20 PM

OK,THIS BOY NAMED JOSE I LIKE HIM SO MUCH,BUT HE HATES ME BECAUSE I GAVE HIM A NOTE THAT SAID I LIKED HIM AND WE WERE REALLY GOOD FRIENDS AND NOW HE WON'T TALK TO ME OR EVEN LOOK AT ME.WHAT SHALL I DO?

ilovemyboyfriend on 2/1/2010 6:44:33 PM

theres this guy ive been crush on 4 a while and he lives up the road from me i think he likes me but hes just soooo moody and i dont know if is hould ask hi wat should i plz help me!!

painogril56 on 1/31/2010 5:55:04 PM

heys guys i need advice!!!

girlrosy251 on 1/31/2010 4:23:09 PM



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