Dear Carol

My best friend is self-centered


Recently, I’ve noticed my best friend is kind of self-centered. Most of the time, we talk about her or whatever she wants to talk about. Or if I’m talking, she relates it to herself in some way. I care about her, but I feel like I’m not important. How do I get this message across.
 
Dear Friend Troubles,
Ideally, conversations should be roughly half talking/half listening. Yet, good listeners are hard to come by. It’s amazing that few people realize a simple “tell me more” or “How did it go?” is always appreciated. Next time you’re talking about your science project and she switches to her history paper, say, in the warmest way, “Wait, I want to hear about that, but I still want to tell you about…” Afterward, thank her for hearing you out or giving advice. This approach is better than shrieking, “You never let me talk!” Your circle of friends will probably always include some girls who are better listeners than others, and that’s fine. But conversation should never be a one-way street.
 
 
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BY CAROL WESTON ON 11/29/2013 12:00:00 AM

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