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Advice

My BF and I hardly hang out. Is our relationship over?


My boyfriend and I have been out of school for awhile. I ask him if he wanted to hang out with me, but he said he was too busy to hang out with me. When texting, we always talk about what we are doing and he always says with his friends. I don't text him that often because I'm afraid I'll annoy him, but now he’s not even texting me anymore. Is this his way of saying it's over or is he just a really bad boyfriend?

His answer: “Your boyfriend isn't the worst boyfriend in the world, neither is your relationship necessarily over. However, it’s not fair for you to continue with the relationship if it continues to consist of no communication between you two and your boyfriend unfortunately choosing to spend time with his friends over you." According to Matthew G., 16, “Instead of getting upset, find a time when you can both sit down together and discuss the state of your relationship. Only by clearly stating your problems to your boyfriend can you hope to somehow create a compromise between you two that will allow you to keep your relationship going strong.”

Decoded: There is no point denying that there is obvious miscommunication between you and your BF. But as hard as it may be, try not to get too upset and talk it out. Be honest with him and hope that he chooses to be honest with you in return.

Your move: Take Matthew’s advice and stay calm throughout your conversation with your BF. Yelling and screaming at each other will only cause more problems between you two and most likely drive you guys apart. Avoid guilt tripping and blame throwing at all costs. So stay positive and be sure to remain honest with yourself and your boyfriend.  If he's willing to make more time for you, thank him for his understanding.  If he can't bother to compromise, you're better off with someone who will make the effort to see you.

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by Kara Gelber | 2/1/2016
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