Dear Carol

"Dear Carol, I'm struggling with a two-sided friend"

Dear Carol,

I have a friend with two sides: one in the morning and one in the afternoon. Side one, she's my BFF and we get along really well. Side two, she's super mad and calls me a know-it-all, stupid, weird and blames stuff on me that I didn't do. We've been friends since third grade (now in sixth). I don't want to stop being BFFs, but I don't want to hang with someone who's mean. I've told her my feelings. She says sorry, but nothing changes.

- Two-Sided Friend

Dear Two-Sided Friend,

This is hard. If she truly has a morning and an afternoon personality, I wonder: Is she eating and sleeping enough? Like, is she starving and exhausted in the afternoon? If so, she should start eating a better lunch. No matter what, you're right to call her out on her behavior. Can you try a note? Say, "Hey, I love you, but I can't stand when you call me weird or stupid, and I'm not going to keep pretending it doesn't bother me. It does. I hope you can work harder to be civil, because otherwise I'm not going to hang out with you after school anymore." Nor should you. And please reach out to other girls. Just because this friend has known you for years doesn't mean she can disrespect you. 

For more on Carol Weston, visit her website:, like her Facebook page or follow her on Instagram. To order Carol's newest book, Speed of Life, click here.

Still need friendship advice? Read more Dear Carol below:

💌 Dear Carol, my friend has a new boyfriend, and I'm worried about drifting apart
💌 Dear Carol, I have to switch schools and don't want to leave my friends
💌 Dear Carol, I'm worried about feeling left out by my friends

We want to hear from you! Go here to submit questions to Carol about every sticky sitch life throws at you.


by GL | 2/6/2023