Tough Stuff

Still sad after a friend's death

I'm having a super-hard time coping with my friend’s death. I tried to numb it out but it’s all coming back. I can’t get a hold of myself! 

I cry myself to sleep and the only things I'm interested in are listening to music and staring into space. My school doesn't have a counselor and I feel like there's no one to talk to. PLEASE help me!

Hey babe, I'm really, really sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine how tough that must be and I'm sure you're feeling all kinds of emotions that are new and confusing to you. Please know that you can get support and that things WILL get better in time.

Put it out there, in private

I know it's not gonna be easy, but you need to get your feelings out so you don't bottle it all up inside. Even if it's not talking to anyone about it just yet, try jotting your thoughts down in a journal once a day. It's a lot more helpful than you might think. Write down some of your favorite memories you had with your friend. You could even pen her a letter telling her how you feel or what you'd really like to tell her.

Share your feelings

I'm sure you're not the only one feeling the way you do right now. Your other friends are probably experiencing the same sort of thing, and it could be helpful if you all sat down and talked about it. It's comforting to know you're not alone.

Get help getting help

Another way to get help? Turn to your parents. They love you and want you to be happy and healthy. If you want to start seeing a counselor, ask them for advice. Even if your school doesn't have one, search your local church or place of worship for someone to talk to or even a support group. There are other people who know what you're dealing with.

Other resources 

It's going to take time for healing and it's totally normal to be grieving the way you are. You've got tons of GL girls here that love you and are always here if ya need to talk!

Check out our Tough Stuff page for a bunch of articles and advice on dealing with loss.

Feel like you need to talk to someone ASAP? Check out this page for a list of numbers and support centers you can call.

Hang in there, babe.  

-Katie S. 

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2/16/2010 7:00:00 AM