My BFF and I are drifting apart

I've been best friends with this one girl for 8 years. Last year, I moved to a new school and now we barely talk. Whenever we are on the phone or online, there's nothing to talk about. I really miss my best friend, but how can I keep this friendship going without it getting too awkward? I don't want to lose her.

Hey girl, sometimes even the best friendships drift apart and it’s neither girls’ fault. You start going to different schools; you see less of each other. It happens gradually and sometimes you don’t even realize it until it may seem like it’s too late. Here’s the thing though: it never is.

While you may not be besties with this girl anymore, your friendship is far from dead. You’ll find by reconnecting and making an effort to see each other, you can def bring this distant friendship back from its “grave.”

It Comes Naturally
First of all, don’t feel bad about what happened. Neither of you did anything wrong; your schools just came between you. A lot of times close friends fall into new cliques, move or go to different places, etc. What’s important to know, however, is that there are definitely new people around you. You don’t have to be limited to one best friend and you’ll find if you have an open mind, your new crew at your school can become some of your closest friends, too.

No Lost Connection
As for your old bestie, getting the convos flowing again is as easy as finding the strength to make the first move. The next time she’s online, try IMing her. You’ll find since it’s been a while since you chatted there will be TONS to catch up on. Ask about her classes, sports, activities, summer plans -- anything. Once you break the ice, it will be like you never were apart in the first place.

As for the awkwardness? Realize it’s not there. Sometimes people can make things way more awk than they have to be by acting and being uncomfortable. Don’t be that person. Know you may not have talked recently, but you’ve got eight years of friendship under your belt (and eight years of memories and inside jokes for those silences).

Let’s Get Together
Once you have your convo and reconnect, continue to talk regularly with your friend. Make a point to bring her back into your life. Invite her to sleepover one weekend. Try inviting her to the next party you have or to meet your new friends. You’ll find the more you talk and see each other (when you can, of course), the more you’ll build a bridge over that gap of separation. Sure, you may not be the besties you used to be, but in the end, what matters is that you still and will always be friends.

Good luck, girl!

Infinite xoxo’s,
Alyssa B.
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4/28/2010 12:02:00 PM
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