I am dating this guy. He is amazing, don’t get me wrong, but I am “technically” not supposed to date. At all. We have gone out once and we talk ALL the time. He knows that I cannot date and he’s cool with it, but I just do not think I can do it any longer. I mean, if my parents ever find out, I’m dead.

Sounds like you have a pretty sweet relationship with a bitter twist. It stinks when mom and dad don’t approve of you dating—a girl needs her parent's support so her relationship can be its very best. The thing you’ve gotta keep in mind though is that your ‘rents aren’t trying to lock you up like Rapunzel: they’re looking out for you and want to make sure you’re mentally ready for a BF. But no worries, princess. I’ve gotta couple ideas that’ll help you please the king 'n' queen and keep the Prince Charming.

Sit down with them and ask them why they don’t want you to date. Chances are it’s ‘cause they don’t think you’re “mature” enough. But prove them wrong. Have a civil talk with them (no arguing or whining, girlie!) and see if you can reach a middle-ground. Maybe you’ve gotta go out with this guy in a group. Perhaps they wanna meet your potential BF first. Keep their feelings in mind—it’s a good way to show you’re compassionate, mature and can handle all the responsibility that comes with a relationship.

Mom and pops want to be involved in your life, and what better way to let ‘em get to know your main squeeze then having him meet them? I know, I know—major move if your ‘rents don’t approve, and I don’t suggest doing it pronto. Talk with your BF about your expectations for the relationship and sitch at home. Make sure he respects your boundaries. Get to know his folks, and see if his folks will talk to yours—that way there’s more communication between families and your darling mom and dad might be willing to bend their rules more if they see this guy really is one-in-a-million. When you’re ready, introduce him to the fam after he’s been played up, of course!

Keep in mind, li'l Juliet, that the reason your parents want to keep the leash on that Romeo is because they really are just looking out for you. Yeah, their rules may seem harsh, but they’re doing it with you in mind. Be happy they care enough, but know that with a li'l luck and persuading, you’ll def find that happy medium. Love always finds a way, girlie, and I’m confident that it will with you too if you take the right steps. Good luck!

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10/16/2009 7:00:00 AM