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49 Comments | Add Yours

My parents punish me instead of helping me



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I’m having some serious issues with my parents. I feel like they just don’t understand me when I do something wrong or forget something.

 

And instead of encouraging me to make the right decisions and remember things, they turn to punishment like taking away my cell phone and iPod.

 

I feel kinda hopeless. I want to make them proud but it seems as though nothing will.

 

Sounds like you’re going through a tough time, girl. I remember feeling like my parents just didn’t get me, too. Often times, this is just a phase that you and your parents will eventually outgrow. But that doesn’t mean there’s noting you can do about it.

 

Often times what happens is that parents overreact to kids doing something wrong, and then kids overreact to the punishment. Perhaps your parents should give you a chance to explain yourself. And when they punish you, instead of feeling hopeless, perhaps you could try to explain yourself more calmly.

 

Don't just get angry and frustrated, but try calmly telling them how you feel. If they understand that you want to make better decisions, and that negative reinforcement is not having their desired effect, you can come up with a solution together that involves positive reinforcement.

 

Your parents do want what’s best for you, so try to have a conversation about this without getting upset and voice yourself in a way that they can understand. Good luck!
 
GOT YOUR OWN FAMILY FEUD? CLICK HERE to submit your own problem to be answered on Girl Talk!

BY LINDSEY SILKEN ON 12/27/2010 7:00:00 AM

POSTED IN problems with my parents, my parents are way-strict

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Mod mod mod
Ok so me and my stepdad and mom have been fighting a lot lately. I also wanted to spend more time with her and be able to talk I her more,I told her and she said we would. Nothing has changed I told her that last year and I keep trying to tell her but she doesn't listen, she actually started talking and hanging out with my step dad more! my mOm married my stepdad when I was 3 do we were kinda close. My mon always has put my stepdad before me in anything.he makes fun of me a lot and she knows and does nothing about it. I try talking to her but she always finds a way not to. I was thinking about moving with my dad but he's really selfish and my stepmom is really mean and doesnt like me I don't know what to do HELP!?!?!,



Hey babe,

You need to find a way to force her to sit down and take you seriously on this.  It may involve going to your Dad or your Stepdad as an outside force.  Let her know just how much you want to do this and that with the way things are you wonder how much she really cares about you, that you just want to be closer to her.
Jordan S.

report

by Haileygab on 5/28/2012 8:02:31 PM

 
 

i feel the exact same way thanks for giving advice on this

report

by kayla8575 on 10/21/2011 3:29:21 PM

 
 



MOD MOD MOD
I am thinking of kissing my bf tomorrow but i am scared bc i havent kissed anyone b4. wat should i do? Help!




Hey babe,

Take a deep breath - a first kiss can be scary, but it'll be totally fine! Read our kissing guide for all the most important tips Smile
Lauren C.

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by abens1997 on 4/25/2011 10:25:24 PM

 
 

i under stand your problem Same with me ive been having silly problems with my dad all the time like when i need to talk to him and he is in pain he just yells and says WHAT!!! and i feel like he dosnt care for me.and sometimes he just gets mad at me for no reason or just not cleaning my room i dont get it i well on my own time but he dosnt have to yell at me!!!??? hes my only parent and he just had a STROKE.that really scares me.he is just being an good parent but he dosnt understand me at all.i really need my space and i cant even talk to him about my feeligs...What do i do????

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by mozilla10 on 3/16/2011 10:52:51 AM

 
 

MOD MOD MOD
My mom says bad things about my dad to my face, so I tell my dad and then he call's my mom saying "I don't like that you keep saying bad things about me." and then she gets peeved and punishes ME for something SHE said. Help??
(please?!)

 

Hey girlie, I think you should tell your dad, and ask him what you should do

Paige T.

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by love_10 on 2/26/2011 9:59:20 AM

 
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