I hate my dad. He has a really bad temper and it's come to physical confrontation before. My mom knows that, but they're still together. 

I wish they would just get a divorce already! What can I do?

Wow, girlie, this is a super tough situation. How do you deal when you can't feel close to one (or both) of your parents, the people who are supposed to mean the most to you? Where can you feel comfortable if it's not in your family's home? I haven't dealt with this personally, but I can only imagine the emotional rollercoaster you're on....and, inevitably, you must have a TON more questions.

If your parents are still staying together, there has to be a reason. Sit your mom down for a one-on-one chat: let her know what about your dad's behavior is upsetting or unsettling to you. After you've explained all of your feelings, ask her to explain hers, and specifically ask what she still loves about your dad. Maybe she can help you see his good qualities; or, alternatively, she might feel more comfortable about making decisions other than staying married to your dad. If you make both of your feelings and emotions known to one another, it'll be easier for you two to find ways to cope.

If your mom doesn't wanna talk it might be best to talk to another family member about the sitch. Tell a favorite aunt or an older cousin what's going on, and see if they can offer some insight. I know you must feel really confused right now. Jot your thoughts down in a journal, go for a run, or set aside a specific time to just put on some music and chill. If you're still confused, definitely look into seeing your school's guidance counselor for more advice.

I know this is a hard situation, but you can get through it! Keep your head up!

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8/15/2009 7:00:00 AM