LIFE

CONTENT WARNING: This piece discusses topics like body image and mental health, which may be distressing for some readers.

I remember sitting on the heels of my soccer cleats at an evening summer practice when I was 10. The grass tickled and pricked at my shins, but the only discomfort I *really* felt came from heavy thoughts in my mind that my body was too big...and therefore not deserving of love.

Like many girls, I gained weight as I started the rite of passage to womanhood: puberty. The rapid changes in my body quickly made me feel humiliated for simply existing.

Three years and several pounds later, I decided to grow my hair down to my waist after a boy in my class commented on the size of my upper arms. I kept my hair long until I was through my first half of college, letting my thick brown strands cascade down my arms, protecting them from being seen—and insulted.

And yet my classmates' nonchalant comments stuck with me. They created an insecurity that resided so deeply inside of me for some of my most formative years.

In the nearly 25 years of girlhood I've lived, it's been a constant struggle to learn to love myself. It's taken years for me to realize that my value is so much more than my physical appearance.

Reminding myself how amazing my body really is has been the biggest factor in my healing journey: My body carries me through this life and supports me through *everything* I do, from walking on tree-lined trails in the fall to dancing to my fave Harry Styles' songs to just hanging out with my besties. 

Another thing that totally transformed my self-love journey? Leaning into the little things that make me feel confident. Whether it's your smile when your sister makes you laugh a little too hard, the way you unconditionally support your squad or the amazing artistic passions you have, take time to reflect and appreciate the *many* things to love about yourself. Psst: They're always within you—you just have to begin to unlock them.

Even as I've made major strides in loving and appreciating my body, there are moments when the bad thoughts creep in and make me feel like I'm right back where I started. That's when I turn to these simple things to get out of my head...

Meditate

 

 

 

 

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Whether you notice it or not, your body physically reacts to your emotional state. And when you're not focusing on your breath? It's all too easy to panic. 

Apps like Headspace, Calm and Smiling Mind help you focus on your breath while addressing the anxious thoughts stuck on the conveyor belt in your head. All it takes is five minutes or less to reset your breathing and bring your mind into a calmer space.

Looking to step it up? Create a meditation corner in your bedroom with a comfy chair, an aromatherapy diffuser and maybe even a mini indoor fountain.

Dance

Dancing has been a huge factor in helping me learn to love myself and my body. Moving around in the first place is v. important, but when you add some serotonin-boosting music on top of it? Girl, you're set to have a good time!

Whether you're pretending you're performing at the Eras Tour as Taylor Swift or channeling totally Y2K vibes by singing Lizzie McGuire songs into your hairbrush, feeling the music and letting your body carry you around your room will help you recenter.

Journal

 

 

 

 

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Journaling is an opportunity to reflect on your emotions and release the weight of them. It's easy to get stuck in a cycle of self-deprecating thoughts, but when you write down how you're feeling, you release some of the hurt that comes with them. 

If you want to start journaling but aren't sure where to begin, jot down a list of affirmations. Affirmations are a great way to remind yourself of the hard truth: that you are beautiful and worthy—no matter what you look like. Begin to use this kind language toward yourself and commend yourself for all of the great things you are and have done.

🩷 My worth is not dependent on the size of my body or the way that I look.
🩷 I deserve to live in a safe space where I honor myself and my body every day.
🩷 I am beautiful.
🩷 I am deserving of love and acceptance. 
🩷 I am a force stronger than I think.
🩷 I am smart, kind, talented, funny and beautiful—no matter what others may think about me and my appearance. 
🩷 I am pure feminine *magic*.

If you're still struggling to come up with your own affirmations, think back on things your loved ones have said to you. I have a poster on my wall with messages from friends and family that remind me that I should see myself the way they see me. Chances are they see your true self—the amazing, incredible, powerful girl that you are!

Get out of the house

Sometimes, you just need a break. When you sit alone at home (especially when you're scrolling through social media) day after day, it can wreak havoc on your mental health. Getting out of the house, whether you go for a solo drive or meet up with friends, will make you feel majorly refreshed.

Talk with a trusted loved one

Tbh, every once in a while, you just need to talk. Opening up to a BFF or family member can help you get confusing thoughts off your chest—and hopefully help bring some clarity to your sitch. 

If you or a loved one are struggling with body image, there is help available. Visit Kids Help Line or Find a Helpline right now.

by Karigan Wright | 10/24/2023