GIRLTALK: Cupcake's Not-So-Sweet Crush

I had a crush (let's call him Tim); he was okay, super nice and everything. But after a while, I began to forget about him and so on. I had a new crush (let's call him Jim). Jim and Tim are best friends. Well, I began to like Jim more than I ever liked Tim. So, I finally got the guts and asked him out. Well...when I did, he pointed at my face and laughed at me. He was like "go out with you? I’d rather go out with a lunch lady." I was really hurt. Tim however, was really nice and told Jim to stop bullying me. I began to cry and I felt really bad. So, every time I’d talk to Tim, Jim would say something like "you're fat" or " I can't believe you'd ever want to go out with me!" Tim would be nice and so on. Now, I have a BIG crush on Tim because I've finally realized how he's the right guy. I have a lot of problems going on now: I need to get Jim to stop bugging me and I need to get Tim to like me (I only have two classes a day with him too!) I need to tell my friend how I feel without having her laugh at me and I know she'll tell him for sure. Plus, guys like me cuz I’m a tomboy boy....I’m sporty and a great friend. I don't wear a lot of girly stuff and make-up and on top of all that. But worst of all,  I’m not allowed to date until I’m 17! Help!


Hey, Cake! Eww…this Jim guy is not very nice! If he gets a kick out of putting people down, I’m thinking this dude has some major issues. Next time he comes around, roll your eyes, toss your hair, and ignore this guy. By reacting to his comments, you’re just giving him fuel to keep at it. Once you stop paying mind to his immature ways, he’ll get bored and stop.

As for Tim: Ladies come on!!! We don’t NEED guys to like us; guys NEED us to like them. O.K., sorry about my little feminist rant (deep breath). So how to get Tim to like you…well, you can't *make* anyone like you. But, if you think you're a good match, here are some suggestions to make him realize it!
If you want Tim to like you for who you are, and you sound like you have no problem with guys liking you, then just be yourself I know its cliché and sounds after school special-ly, but it’s really the best way.
It also couldn’t hurt to drop some hints here and there. Show him that you’re interested. Since he’s friends with Mr. Not So Nice, he probably knows you asked him out and could think you’re still hung up on him. When you’re with Tim, perk up and smile. Ask him specific questions that apply just to him (like, "How was your game last night?" or "Hey, I saw that Green Day sticker on your locker, are you going to see them in May?") Then, of course, be attentive to what he says.

Hopefully, he'll get the picture and start making the same kinda conversation with you! (Of course, if ya wanna flirt a little, that's allowed, too! Just don't come right out and tell him you like him! It can be overwhelming and backfire, especially if the timing's not right!) Since your not allowed to date till you’re 17, take your time and build a friendship with him first.

Now, as for your giggly friend who you can’t seem to trust, let her know what’s up. Tell her it hurts your feelings when she laughs at you and you want to confide in her, but she makes it hard. If she still doesn’t change her ways, maybe this friend is not worthy to hold that title.

Hoping for the best,

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2/2/2007 7:45:00 PM