Dear Carol

"Dear Carol, I don't want my dad to get remarried"

Dear Carol,

My mom and dad got a divorce three years ago. For the past two years, my dad has had a girlfriend...and he just proposed to her, but I don’t want my dad to get remarried. What should I do?

- My Dad Is In Love

Dear My Dad Is In Love,

Divorce is not uncommon, and if your parents have been divorced for three years, you’ve probably done a lot of the work of accepting that. Your dad has already been dating the new woman for two years? That’s a long time, too (he didn’t get down on one knee on a whim). If she’s caring and smart, that can be good for all of you—and you’d be wise to figure out how to get along with her. It’s not a betrayal of your love for your mom to be kind to the woman with your dad. Might it help to congratulate them both? What can you and your soon-to-be stepmom do together (pedicures? pickle- ball? planting a flower garden?). Even if you’re not her biggest fan, you still need to try to make the best of it. My mother was widowed twice (!), so I know how hard it can be to welcome a stepparent. But I was glad that my mom was happy—and her second and third husbands were good men, even though they weren’t my dad.

Carol Weston is the author of 16 books. The latest is Speed of Life, about a teen girl who writes to an advice columnist. Check out for more.

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by GL | 3/26/2024